Jokes Corner - March 2005

LottoBug

Member
Sam Wan: Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan.

Mr. Sori: Yes, you could speak to me.

Sam Wan: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!

Mr. Sori: You are talking to someone! Who is this?

Sam Wan: I'm Sam Wan. And I need to talk to Annie Wan!
It's urgent.

Mr. Sori: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?

Sam Wan: Well just tell my sister, Annie Wan, that our brother was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is going to the hospital.

Mr. Sori: Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital from the accident that isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!!!

Sam Wan: You are rude. Who are you?

Mr. Sori: I'm Sori.

Sam Wan: You should be sorry. Now give me your name!

Mr. Sori: I'm Sori!!

Sam Wan: I don't like your tone of voice, Mister! And I don't care, give me your name!

Mr. Sori: Look man, I told you already I'm Sori! I'm Sori!! I'm SORI!!! You didn't even give me your name!

Sam Wan: I told you before I'm Sam Wan! I'm Sam Wan!!! You better be careful, my father is Sam Buddy. And my uncle holds a very big position in the company. He is Noe Buddy!

Mr. Sori: Oh I'm so scared (sarcastically). Look I don't care about your uncle who's nobody. Everybody thinks they're top dog and holding an important position in the company.

Sam Wan: No, Avery Buddy just married my uncle who's Noe Buddy. And Avery Buddy doesn't work there.

Mr. Sori: Like I said, I don't care if your uncle screws everybody and I also know that not everyone works here! Jeez!!!

Sam Wan: Now, Avery Wan is my mother!

Mr. Sori: You need one! Okay, look, I got work to do and if I'm feeling mischievous I'll broadcast it on the P.A. system saying. "Attention, someone called and said that anyone's brother just got involved in an accident. No one got injured and no one was sent to the hospital. But everyone is going to the hospital anyways. The father maybe somebody but if you're their uncle, you're nobody." How bout that?

Sam Wan: Why don't you do it right now?

Mr. Sori: Fine! I will! (irritably announces message)

Sam Wan: By the way Yoe Nead Wan is also my cousin who is your supervisor.

Mr. Sori: Whatever! I don't care who you're related to anymore. And my supervisor is Yoe (long pause)......... Oh I'm sorry!

Sam Wan: Sorry?!! Sorry?!! ...Sori? (long pause) Are you the guy dating my sister-in-law, Annie Moore?

Mr. Sori: No... Not anymore...

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Was that good or what ?????
*************************************************

A GIRL'S PRAYER

Here goes..........

At age 20 - "Lord, I want the best man."

At age 25 - "Lord, I want a good man."

At age 30 - "Lord, I want any man."

At age 40 - "Lord, pretty pretty please ..."
 
Guess my wife will be 20 forever:)

How Many Christians Does It Take to Change a Light Bulb?

*Charismatic:* Only 1 - Hands are already in the air.

*Pentecostal:* 10 - One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the
spirit of darkness.

*Presbyterians:* None - Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

*Roman Catholic:* None - Candles only. (Of guaranteed origin of course.)

*Baptists:* At least 15 - One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

*Episcopalians:* 3 - One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks, and one to talk about how much better the old one was.

*Mormons:* 5 - One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

*Unitarians:* We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

*Methodists:* Undetermined - Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or
tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.

*Nazarene:* 6 - One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

*Lutherans:* None - Lutherans don't believe in change.

*Amish:* What’s a light bulb?

found on
http://www.christianforums.net/viewtopic.php?t=12753

Lotto
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